Your Wedding Day at Ss Peter and Paul, Leybourne
Download our Wedding Booklet
Download our Wedding Information Booklet here.
We are delighted that you have decided to get married in Church and we hope that the information in this booklet will be helpful in making your "big day" run as smoothly as possible.
The whole event may seem terribly complicated and daunting, but because you are entering into a legal contract, as well as holding a very special service in Church, it is important that we get things right, so there are particular things we have to do.
Firstly, there is no need to worry. You can always contact us if you have any concerns. Your concerns may be major to you but hopefully can be sorted quickly.
The Marriage Service is primarily a religious occasion, and we hope a very joyful one too. You will be inviting all your friends and relatives to share in your public declaration of your love for each other.
Marriage is not a private arrangement between two consenting adults, because from now on your friends will treat you as a different type of couple, and so you will be making solemn promises to each other in a very public way to demonstrate that you are taking the matter seriously. You could do this of course, without any religious ceremony, at a Registry Office, but whilst a Christian marriage does not ignore the social and legal aspects of getting married, it puts them in the context of worshipping God.
The promises that you are going to make to each other are made in the presence of God, and the rings that you are going to wear from now on are symbols of God's eternal love for you, as well as your love for each other. The service is also a wonderful opportunity to give thanks for the gift of love and marriage, which God has given to you.
The Legal "Bits"
When booking your wedding and completing the Marriage Application Form the information that you will be asked to give must be accurate in every detail. You will sign it and date it to confirm that it is correct so you need to be very careful in filling it in.
This information will be used to prepare the Parish Register, the Registrar's Return and your Marriage Certificate. Obviously all the information that you give us will be treated in the strictest confidence.
The first thing we need to know is whether you live in the Parish of the Church in which you wish to get married. We have an accurate list of all the addresses, which we can consult if you are in doubt.
You can be married in this Church if one (or both) of you live in our Parish, or if you and/or your partner is on the Electoral Roll of this Church. To be included on our Electoral Roll you will have to have been a regular worshipper at this Church for at least six months before we can include you on that list. This Electoral Roll is made up once a year in March, so it is important that you are included on this, if you intend to use this as the reason for being married in Church.
If you have a clear family connection with the church such as parents married here or members of the family baptized or buried here this may also qualify you to get married here.
There are two other ways of gaining permission to get married in a Church; using a Common Licence or an Archbishop's Special Licence (an Archbishop's Special Licence is only granted in exceptional circumstances).
Because you are entering into a legal contract, the law requires that you announce your intention to marry to the local community, and so your Banns of Marriage are read on three consecutive Sundays within 3 months of your wedding. Although you are not required to be at the services when your Banns are read, it would be nice to see you, and you would be very welcome.
The important thing to remember is that if only one of you resides in the parish of this Church you must also have your Banns read in the Church in the Parish in which the other of you lives. So when you have decided when you are going to get married, go and see the Vicar in the other Parish and make arrangements for the Banns to be read there too.
After the Banns have been read in the "other" Church, you must collect the Banns Certificate, which confirms that the Banns have been read in Church on three consecutive Sundays. We must see this certificate before we can legally marry you, so make sure you bring it back to us before your Wedding Day.
Getting married is a big step in your life, and therefore it is important that you think about what you are doing and why you are getting married. I would value the opportunity to get to know you and share some thoughts with you about this new and exciting stage in your life. I will at this time also take the opportunity to explain the Christian teaching on marriage.
We will arrange to meet on a few occasions before your Wedding Day, as well as for a rehearsal for the actual ceremony during the week leading up to the day.
These sessions will be arranged to fit in with all your other commitments, and we hope that they will offer you opportunities to think about what you are doing.
Best man, Bridesmaids etc.
It is usual for the Bridegroom to have a "Best man" who "looks after him" on the Wedding Day. He would normally be a good friend or a close relation, and it is his job to look after the rings before the service and he will be given the Marriage Certificate at the end of the service. Again it is quite usual for the Bride to be "given away" by her father, but there may well be reasons why this is not possible and so a friend or close relation can do this job quite happily.
Both the Bride and the Groom sign the Marriage Registers together with two witnesses. The witnesses can be anyone who actually attends the service and sees that you are safely married! You may want to choose your Best man and Chief Bridesmaid, or perhaps your parents... it really does not matter who it is from a legal point of view.
It may be the tradition for the Bride to arrive late, but it is not a good one! It may well cause problems if there is another wedding in the same Church that day, but it is also not good manners to keep guests waiting, and they will not thank you for arriving late if they have made a special effort to get there on time for you. There are also a number of other people at the Church who may also be inconvenienced by any delay.
When you book your transport, allow plenty of time for traffic delays. I promise you, no one will complain if you are early! When you arrive at the Church it is quite likely the photographer will want to photograph you getting out of the car, and to have a picture of you coming into Church with the person who is "giving you away" and all of this takes time, so if you arrive ten minutes before the time that your service is going to start this is by no means too long. It goes without saying that the groom needs to arrive before the bride!
We will arrange for the Church to be unlocked by the time you get there, and someone will be on hand to help with greeting your guests, to give out buttonholes and service sheets, and to help people to their places. Please arrive at least 30 mins early.
If you know that you have guests who are disabled, we can accommodate them easily in Church. It would be helpful if you can inform us in advance and we will do everything possible to assist their access.
It is traditional to throw confetti at the married couple in the Church Yard after the service; there are no restrictions on throwing it in our church yard.
Printed Order of Service
Many couples like to have an Order of Service printed and the words of the hymns on it. They can be very elaborate (and very expensive) but they need not be. A simple A4 sheet folded can be very attractive and have all the necessary information on it.
As you will see from the list of fees at the back of the booklet we are very happy to arrange this for you.
If you would like to produce this yourself, any desktop publishing software will produce very acceptable results.
The important thing is to get the information on it correct, so do check the final draft with the priest before you run off your thousands! Speaking of which, always do an extra 20 or so for the Choir, Clergy etc.
Your service sheet will normally need the following information:
On the front cover you will normally have the Bride and Groom's name and the date etc.
On the 2nd page onwards:
- Music for the entry of the Bride (E.g. The Bridal Chorus by Richard Wagner)
- The Welcome
- The 1st Hymn (words printed out)
- The Reading (e.g. A Reading from the 1st Letter to the Corinthians)
- The Address
- The Marriage
- The signing of the Registers
- The Prayers
- The final Hymn (words printed out)
- The Blessing
- Music for the Wedding Procession (e.g. The Wedding March by Felix Mendelssohn)
Those words in bold can appear in the service sheet exactly as they stand. Try to make sure that the point size is large enough (at least 12) bearing in mind that some of your older guests may not be able to read small print! Please bring the service sheets along to the rehearsal, so that you don't forget them on the day, and then they will be ready for your Ushers to give out without you having to worry about this.
During the service there is NO collection, however, your guests will be given the opportunity to contribute to the upkeep of our beautiful building at the end of the service; please urge them to give generously. You will understand that the costs of maintaining an historic building like ours are very high, and can only be enjoyed by couples in the future who wish to get married in Church if we can keep it in good repair.
Photography and Video
Couples usually employ a professional photographer. When you see your photographer, please tell him/her to come to see the Priest who is taking the service twenty minutes or so before the service starts. The Priest will explain that as many photos as you like can be taken outside the Church, but during the service we need to be careful about where the photos are taken from and when, to avoid detracting from the dignity of the service.
The usual procedure is for the photographer to be allowed to take a couple of photographs when you are taking vows (from an inconspicuous place in the chancel) and also when you have signed the registers. He/she will probably get you to pose for these pictures after the writing has been done.
The other occasion when photographs are permitted is when you are walking down the aisle to leave the church as Husband and Wife.
Please ask your guests not to take photographs during the service. There will be plenty of opportunities to take pictures after the ceremony!
You may wish your wedding to be recorded on Video. Don't forget to tell them to be at the Church at a reasonable time before the service. We will ask that they set up their tripod in a convenient position in the Church and that it must stay there and not be moved around. (Please note that we assume that the service will be recorded as most now are.) If music is to be played on a CD/ipod during the recording of the video please note that it is your legal duty to obtain a PPL license: www.PRSformusic.com/lm
There will be some flowers in church but if you wish to have additional floral displays these can be arranged with Lucille Luton (phone 01732 845280) at additional cost to be negotiated with her – these may be taken away with you.
We are proud of the very high standard of flower arranging in Church, and we will do our best to make sure the flowers complement the colours that you have chosen for your wedding.
Because there may be more than one wedding on the day, it is obviously important that we try to satisfy everyone's wishes, so you need to be in contact with us as early as possible, in order that we can make the necessary arrangements. As soon as you have a definite date for your wedding, please contact the flower arranger and have a chat with them. They will do their best to arrange flowers to suit your requirements.
Music is a vital ingredient in the Marriage Service. It sets the atmosphere and enables everyone to join in singing the Hymns.
When choosing your Hymns try to choose ones that you think everyone will know and therefore be able to join in the singing. (Our own favourites may not be very well known to everyone!)
It is usual to have two Hymns, and this seems to fit very comfortably into the Order of Service; one at the beginning, the second after the Signing of the Registers.
You will need to discuss your choice of music before you print your Order of Service. The organist will be pleased to talk to you about this, preferably after the Sunday service when your banns are read or at some mutually convenient time well before your Wedding date.
Dear Lord and Father of Mankind
Love Divine all loves excelling
Lead Us Heavenly Father Lead Us
Lord of all Hopefulness
All Things Bright and Beautiful
Morning has broken
Praise my soul the King of Heaven
This site is very useful for help in planning:
During the week leading up to your Wedding, a rehearsal is arranged so everyone knows what to do on the day. One evening during that week is probably more convenient, but please speak to the Priest taking the Service to arrange a suitable time for all concerned.
Try to get the following people to come along to the Church for the rehearsal:
Bride and Groom (!)
Bride and Groom's Parents
Bridesmaid(s) / Page Boy(s) (Particularly useful if you are using children, so that they know what they are doing.)
The rehearsal will take approximately an hour, so that we can address all your concerns regarding what will happen.
Marriage fees 2019
Statutory fee PCC, (inc costs of Verger, heating, lighting, cleaning) £455
You may of course choose to provide your own florist. But if you would like us to provide flowers at a reduced rate please tick here. …….
We have skilled arrangers who will be happy to discuss arrangements with you (see booklet)
USE OF CASTLE GROUNDS FOR PHOTOS £100
We will ask you to contact the owners directly to discuss arrangements.
120 COPIES £120
The total amount is due two months before the wedding
Please return to the parish priest. 73 Rectory Lane North, Leybourne, Kent. ME19 5HD ASAP with your banns form
* These items are subject to change each year and are passed by the Church Commissioners and changes will therefore be reflected in the overall cost year to year. Payment of these fees should be made in advance and passed to the Parish Priest.
The Revd Matthew Buchan, The Rectory, 73, Rectory lane North, Leybourne, Kent ME19 5HD Tel: 01732 842187 E-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Completed the Marriage Application Form and the fees form.
- Had your banns read in "the other parish" (if necessary)
- Booked the date with the Priest for your rehearsal
- Chosen your music in consultation with the organist
- Informed the Priest if you are having a video and obtained a PPL license if necessary
- Spoken to the appropriate flower arranger
- Had your Order of Service printed (after checking it with parish Priest)
- Organised a photographer and asked them to arrive 20 mins early
- Let us know if any of your guests are disabled
- Paid all fees in advance of the rehearsal?